Conflicts are part of life. What is needed, as William Ury, an American anthropologist and negotiation expert says, is not so much to avoid conflicts as to transform them. To transform is to change the form of the conflict (trans-form) from being destructive to constructive. Transforming is more active and positive than avoiding or just managing conflicts. Here we shall explore some ways for doing it.
Principles and Steps for Transforming Conflicts
The principles and steps given here are taken mostly from the studies of Roger Fisher and William Ury.
1) Separate the People from the Problem
Conflicts have a content dimension and a relationship dimension or in other words a problem factor and a people factor. The problem factor refers to what the conflict is about (goals, objectives, strategies, decisions). The people factor refers to the desire for esteem, control, and connectedness, and gets expressed in how the two parties view, interact with, and relate to each other and the emotions at play. Conflicts could be about either one or both factors. In most cases these factors are intertwined, and it is difficult to separate them. All the same, it is important to separate these two factors and address them both.
Jose Kuttianimattathil, sdb
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