Is it possible to wholly trust God with your future when your past is marred with pain?
I was not fortunate enough to be born in a Catholic family. I come from a staunch Hindu home. All through my life I kept searching for God.
Seeking and Finding
In Jeremiah 29:13, the Lord says, “If you search for me, you will find me, if you seek me with all your heart.” It was only when I reached first year of college, I casually went to the famous St Michael’s Church in Mumbai to attend a Novena to Our Lady of Perpetual Succour. At the end of that Novena, I had tears streaming down my face. It was as if I had met Mother Mary in person. As the prayer goes, “Lead us to Jesus, your loving Son.” it was Mary who led me closer and closer to her Son Jesus.
I was the only child of my parents. Usually when I say, “only child,” people assume I must have been very pampered. In my case, it was just the opposite. My childhood was filled with loneliness, depression and sadness. My parents were constantly busy making ends meet. I never experienced their love. My dad was a very strict man. Just one look from him was enough to bring tears to my eyes. I was so afraid of him. So, for nine long years it remained a secret between my Jesus and me.
In the year 1998, I went for my first retreat to Divine Retreat Centre in Kerala. Though still a Hindu at this retreat, I received the Baptism in the Holy Spirit. I was blessed with the gift of praying in tongues and also received the Spirit of boldness to face the world outside. I was no longer afraid of what my parents would do, but couldn’t imagine another day without Jesus.
Irma Raymond
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