preview

John was brought for psychotherapy by his wife. She said John was no longer the man he had been. He was refusing to go to office. He preferred to stay in bed the whole day. He had been very active and used to exercise daily. Now he has stopped all that. He takes bath only occasionally, and does not shave. Sometimes he talks of killing himself. She said she is scared he might do something drastic. That’s why she forced him to come for therapy. While the wife narrated all this, John sat slumped on the couch.  When the therapist asked him if he had anything to say, he just sat there silent…. In later sessions the therapist learned that John, who had been a very successful businessman, had made a disastrous investment decision, was on the verge of losing his business, and threatened with lawsuits.

Sr Dolores, 55 years old, was no longer her usual self. An excellent and well-appreciated teacher, she began to lose interest in teaching. Homework books began to pile up. Never one to miss community gatherings, she was now late even for prayers. She wasn’t eating much, and complained that she would often get up in the middle of the night and be crying for no reason. She complained of chest and stomach pains. Several visits to doctors and a number of tests found no organic (physical) reason for her pain.  On the physician’s recommendation, her provincial superior referred Sr Dolores for psychotherapy. The psychotherapist learned from the provincial superior that, about a year ago, a close friend of Sr Dolores, another sister in her congregation, had died in a jeep accident. During the course of therapy, Sr Dolores disclosed that her father had died in an accident when she was a junior sister. She had not been able to go home at that time and was not present for the funeral.

FR JOSE PARAPPULLY SDB

To read the entire article, click Subscribe

Ambivalent like life itself, our family is the cradle of our happiness—and our unhappiness. Although its impact on our personal development is not irreversible, given the helplessness and vulnerability of the newly born baby, as well as of the child and the adolescent, our early experiences get recorded in our memory and stay on for decades, either as “Guardian Angels” or as “Demons” that can help or destroy us, without our being aware how long they have been there, or even why. They stay on, however, making us believe that we are responsible for our past and our future, while, as a matter of fact, this freedom we dream of is largely a fantasy.

Home as Heaven

When our home is a heaven, as J. W. Chapman would put it, then our adult life is a backpack full of resources. If our experiences were of affection, of unconditional love, of adequate parental models, and of norms and guidelines that taught us to relate with mutual respect, our personal development proceeds on a smooth road towards worthwhile goals, and that, too, without too much waste of fuel. We may even think, with a bit of arrogance, that it is all our merit, but this is a minor fault, because, given the love we received at home, our links with the past will be full of gratitude, and our links to the future will be about caring for the next generation. This way, we also contribute to life by spreading goodness around us.

Professor Adelina Gimeno

To read the entire article, click Subscribe

Priya: What a Childhood!

Priya’s was born at a construction site. Her parents were illiterate manual labourers. Her mother had to return to work a few weeks after Priya was born. She carried Priya to her work place, nursed and attended to her needs during her breaks.  Being saddled with household duties and heavy work at the construction site, the mother had very little time to bond with Priya during her infancy and toddler years. In addition, Priya’s father was an alcoholic, who spent all his earnings on drinks. Though not abusive, he did not provide for the needs of the family; and hardly ever interacted with Priya. Priya grew malnourished. On a few occasions, when she was left unattended at home, she was sexually abused by a stranger. This happened when she was just six years old.

In her childhood, Priya’s family was constantly relocated to different construction sites. Thus, Priya did not have a stable home; nor could she be admitted to a regular school. She was occasionally tutored by NGO workers, but did not have a steady early education. Thus, when she was later admitted to a municipal-run school, she was unable to follow her teacher, or to read or to write. Her classmates looked down on her, since she was always restless, dreamy, unable to cope with her studies, and kept a distance. Disheartened, Priya dropped out of school in standard IV. Her mother then entrusted her with household work and care of her younger siblings.

Priya lived in make-shift sheds amidst unhygienic surroundings at construction sites; and sometimes did not even have a single wholesome meal a day. Her mother was unaware of vaccines. Thus, Priya was often ill, suffered from skin rashes and digestive ailments

Fr Ajoy Fernandes SDB

To read the entire article, click Subscribe

Every legal entity (Society or Trust) is established by its promoters to carry out certain set aims, goals or objectives. The promoters have in mind a certain purpose to be achieved and this purpose is called as the objective/s of the entity.  The purpose or objective is the reason for bringing the entity into existence. The object clause is very important and constitutes the heart of the constitution (memorandum of association or trust deed) of the entity.

Charitable & Religious Purposes

The Societies Registration Act 1860 was promulgated with an intention to enable members of the public to carry on literary, scientific and charitable activities by registering themselves into a Society.  These activities included the promotion of literature, science, fine arts, diffusion of useful knowledge (including political education), charitable and religious purposes. The “charitable purposes” were: relief of poverty, education and other purposes beneficial to the community. “Religious purpose” covered the advancement of religion (Hindu Public v. Rajdhani Puja Samithee AIR 1999 Supreme Court 964). Accordingly, a society can be registered for carrying on any or all of the following objectives: military orphan fund; promotion of science, literature, fine arts; diffusion of useful knowledge; foundation and/or maintenance of public libraries or reading-rooms, public museums and galleries of paintings and art; collection of natural history, mechanical and philosophical inventions, instruments, or designs.  These objects or purposes mentioned above are only illustrative and not exhaustive.

“Charitable”: Meaning and Seven Areas

The word, “charitable” has been widely defined, and is understood in many ways. The Gospel or Christian understanding of charity is very broad and captured in the all-embracing statements, such as, “love for neighbour” and “whatever you do to the least of my brothers / sisters you do it unto me.” The Supreme Court (in the case Lokashikshna Trusts Vs CIT) stated “Charity denotes altruistic thoughts and actions with the object of benefitting others, without benefitting oneself.” Further, various laws and courts in India have, from time to time, clarified the understanding of charity through the legal framework and decisions. Hence the legal understanding of the concept of charity is different from a personal or religious understanding. The legal definitions and decisions and not my personal or religious understanding will be the final word on charity, and this will be applicable to a Society or Trust.

Fr Trevor D’Souza OFM  

To read the entire article, click Subscribe

What would you do if you were listening to a homily during which the priest-homilist says, “My wife used to tell me…”? Well, that is exactly what this priest used to say so often during his homilies. Those who didn’t know about his fascinating journey to priesthood would giggle and look around, but that didn’t bother him.

Probo Vaccarini, an Italian born on 4 June 1919, studied mathematics. He joined the Italian army and, during World War II, fought in Russia. After the war, he became a surveyor. His friend, who had fought along with him in Russia, was a handsome guy and apparently had everything a young man would aspire for. But he always looked distressed, dejected and uninterested in anything. But, after some time, Probo was surprised to see him transformed—happy, cheerful and energetic. When Probo asked him for the secret, he told him about the confession he had made to Padre Pio, the Capuchin priest, who was immensely popular as a confessor and a spiritual guide—now  St Pio of Pietrelcina. The friend suggested that he too should go and meet the saintly Padre.

Probo followed his friend’s advice and went to meet Padre Pio. He was so impressed and touched that he made him his regular confessor. Once,   when Probo asked him what he should do with his life, Padre Pio told him he should get married and have a “big and holy family.”  An amused and puzzled Probo said, “Big is easy, but holy …?” When he met him again to tell him he still remained unmarried, Padre Pio told him to get moving.

Fr M A Joe Antony SJ

To read the entire article, click Subscribe

At the recent consultation for the appointment of our new provincial, one of the questions that was asked was: “What qualities should the new provincial possess?”  One of the first qualities that was mentioned was this: “He should not only be good at animation but also at governance.”

What is governance? What does it imply?

During the discourse on Maundy Thursday Jesus said: “I am the way, and the truth, and the life” (John 14:6).  In this statement of Jesus, we have the three fundamental functions of the Church.  Jesus is the truth, and the Church has the duty to bring to the world his message of salvation.  Jesus is the life, and the Church has the mission to transmit grace through the sacraments.  Jesus is the way, and the Church has the responsibility to lead people to God.  These are the three functions of the Church: the function of teaching, sanctifying and governing (traditionally called, ecclesiastical powers or sacred powers).  These correspond to the three messianic offices of Jesus: Jesus the prophet, priest and shepherd (Lumen Gentium, n. 21:2).  While all the baptized share in these three functions, the superiors share in them in a way proper to their office, through the instrumentality of the Church (Canon 618-19).  Here we concern ourselves with the function of governing.

In general, governing means steering or directing a group of people.  More specifically, governing may be described as the process of pastorally managing and directing the people of God, in accordance with the power bestowed on the Church by Christ, for the attainment of their temporal welfare and their final end, which is eternal life.  Governing is the exercise of power or authority for realizing the goals of a congregation and the total well-being of its members.

Fr Jose Kuttianimattathil SDB

To read the entire article, click Subscribe

Covid-19 has led to millions getting sick and hundreds of thousands dying  worldwide. The pandemic has led to significant increases in stress and anxiety, especially in the context of fear of being infected and in the face of an uncertain and unpredictable future. Social isolation, economic downturn, unemployment and poverty have taken a heavy toll on people’s wellbeing. A painful consequence of all this is an increase in mental illness.

Although mental illness is more visible and disconcerting during this distressing time, it is important to focus on mental health and wellbeing. Understanding it and looking at measures that foster it, can help us to avoid mental illness and help us cope with it better if we suffer from it.

Mental health is not just absence of mental illness. It is a state of holistic wellbeing, in which the mind, body and spirit function harmoniously and enables a person to live joyfully and productively, finding meaning and purpose in life. It is a state that enables us to thrive, to flourish, to live life to the full.

Graceful and Happy

This life to the full is especially characterized by healthy interpersonal relationships, playfulness and joy, a sense of contentment, capacity to adapt to change, and character virtues like love, hope, altruism, compassion, sensitivity, capacity to endure adversity, loss and suffering without being unduly distressed or disturbed, and resilience, that is, the capacity to bounce back from setbacks.

…….

FR JOSE PARAPPULLY SDB

To read the entire article, click Subscribe

It is easier to define sickness than health. When someone says, “I have a toothache,” or “My left knee has a fracture,” we get the meaning. But how do we define health? It has so many aspects! From breathing and eating, to digestion and excretion, the flow of blood, our cholesterol and sugar levels, the condition of our brain, heart, lungs, intestines, kidneys and organs of reproduction. Most of the time, health is something we take for granted, isn’t it?

No one has perfect bodily health. We all have some minor aches and pains, but this does not mean we need hospitalization or major surgery, or are at the point of death.

All this goes for our mental health as well. When there is something wrong, e.g., when someone is often moody, or screaming at people for nothing, or gets panic attacks, we realize that something is wrong. But when we are able to function “normally,” we do not think about mental health, do we?

Four Aspects

To be mentally healthy means:

• That we manage our emotions well: We are normally happy and serene, not unduly angry or moody or swinging from one extreme to the other.
• That we can take correct decisions: The decisions we make in day-to-day matters prove to be correct. Examples: How we plan our work, spend our money, look after those in our care.

……

Fr Joe Mannath SDB

To read the entire article, click Subscribe

My name is Sr Laisa. I am a religious for twenty-seven years.    Our new provincial has organised an ongoing formation programme during the summer vacation for two weeks concluding with one week’s retreat.  She has desired that all those who have completed twenty-five years or more are to attend this programme.  Right now, I am principal of a prestigious college. To be away for three weeks from the college is difficult for me. Despite my repeated requests, she has not exempted me.  As a principal, I get various opportunities to attend seminars, meetings, etc., and update myself. What is so extraordinary about such programmes?   

To answer your query, let us look into CIC canon 661: “Religious are to be diligent in continuing their spiritual, doctrinal and practical formation throughout their lives.  Superiors are to ensure that they have the assistance and the time to do this.”  Though there is no exact parallel canon in Oriental Canon Law, we read in CCEO canon 471§1, which deals with monasteries: “The manner of formation of members is to be determined in the typicon in such a way that they be permanently motivated to aim more fully toward holiness of life, as well as that their abilities be developed through the study of sacred doctrine and the acquisition of human culture in accordance with the needs of the time, and that they thereby become more adept in the arts and tasks which are legitimately undertaken by the monastery.” And the Directives on Formation in Religious institutes, Potissimum institutioni, numbers 67 to 71, deal with it extensively.

The responsibility for this ongoing formation is twofold: (i) the religious themselves must do what is necessary to renew and update themselves in spiritual, doctrinal and practical matters;

……..

Sr Licia SMI

To read the entire article, click Subscribe

This year, perhaps more than ever, most of us are happy to put the past year behind us.  The coronavirus has been an obvious dark cloud that has hung over the whole world for most of the year. Marked by loss of fundamental freedoms, increasing divisiveness and widespread economic hardship, 2020 could easily be viewed as a disaster.  The tremendous increases in addictions, abuse and suicide provide stark testimony to the hardships faced by so many in dealing with the changes wrought by the coronavirus and our society’s efforts to control the spread of the illness.  As people of faith, we would be remiss in not taking at least one last long look back at 2020 to see how the Holy Spirit may have used this time of struggle to remind us of some very important and beautiful truths.

Limitations and Benefits

One of the first impressions I recall from the early days of the pandemic was that we would be moving into a period of profound change that might endure for a long time.  As government officials quickly imposed controls, we came to realize that we had two choices: we could resist those changes or we could acquiesce and seek to find joy in other ways.  As we faced lockdowns and stay-at-home orders, Crystal and I soon found ourselves enjoying the simplicity of daily life. Freed from the distractions of our self-imposed busyness, we had a chance to enjoy more time to ourselves, rekindling an intimacy that comes from spending more time with each other.  It was wonderful to sense a renewed awareness of the needs of the other and a fuller acceptance of each other’s, dare I say, idiosyncrasies.

…….

Kevin Sullivan