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Annette (name changed) was sobbing, pools of tears forming on the Bible she held. I was absolutely disconcerted. For myself more than for her. Was it a mistake that I was there? She needed an expert’s help.

It was a youth retreat. I had been asked to help with the counseling. That was a first for me, although I had been organising youth ministry for a couple of years. I agreed to counsel a few of the “front benchers”; they were the enthusiastic and attentive section. I reasoned that they should be having most of the answers. All I would need to do is say a prayer for them and offer some affirmation or prayer guidance.

Annette was the first in the queue. When I saw her approaching me, I thought: This should be an easy session. She looked very traditional and seemed a bit “hyper charismatic,” as she greeted me with a bright smile and a rather happy “Praise the Lord!”

As I began the session praying in simple words of praise, I saw the person before me crumble in grief and hopelessness. She began to share her story. She had been abused from the age of six by her own brothers. In her teens, when they left the country, she got into a series of very abusive relationships. She had stopped going to Church. She told me she hated her family, hated everyone, hated herself and didn’t believe in God. She was forced to come for this retreat by her cousins.

Maria Sangeetha Sanjeevi

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I was born in a Christian family. My dad was Anglican and my mum Catholic. Both were equally staunch in their beliefs. My mother was insistent on having us baptised and was very diligent in raising us in the faith, ensuring we go for daily Mass and sending us for retreats during summer vacations. It planted a seed of knowing God in a deep way.

When I came to college, many things changed. I lost my closeness to Jesus. The earlier sincerity in the small and simple things of life seemed unimportant. I began questioning the practice of traditional prayers. I stopped going to church.

During my second year I fell in love with a girl. It seemed most appropriate since it seemed that everyone else had a girlfriend. Over time I was quite sure she would be the one I would marry. I changed the course of my career, opting for a post graduation that would help me to be with her. A year later, my world crashed when I discovered that she had become friendly with another classmate. I was shattered and unable to see a future. My grief turned into anger. I was determined to prove to this girl that I could outshine her during the rest of the course. I was filled with unforgiveness and hatred. I was so disturbed I realised I must go for the retreat and try to find some peace. At the retreat centre I developed high fever. During the Eucharistic adoration where special prayers were offered for the healing of inner wounds, the priest who leading the service, Fr Augustine Vallooran, mentioned my name and gave a message to forgive and see how God works. It was hard. I nevertheless prayed for the unforgiveness and hate to be removed. As soon as I did this, I could feel a cool sensation over my body. I realised I had received the grace to completely forgive the girl and the boy whom she was in love with.

Marcus Silus Sam

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For seventeen years, I suffered much pain and several health problems. A decade ago, I was just a fashion designer with my own office in Mumbai, with little or no relationship with the Lord. I lived a powerless life, even though the world thought I had everything.

It was in the year 1997 when I was going into a paralytic stroke that I met our Lord. I had a locked jaw. When I called my doctor, all he could tell me was, “Mrs Rebello, your nervous system is damaged; so, things like this will happen.” I had been sick with spondylitis and an irregular blood circulation for many years. Many doctors told me I had to live with these problems.

So, when all doors close, we say let’s try God. I was told of a prayer meeting in the Holy Spirit hospital. When I reached the service, I felt a little unusual as I had never attended a Charismatic service before. All the singing and clapping made me very uncomfortable. I thought these were a bunch of hysterical people singing to the Lord. When the Word of God was preached, I did not bat an eyelid for forty-five minutes, which was very unusual for me. Tears began to flow. The Word of God touched my heart deeply. From then the Holy Spirit started waking me up to pray at 3 am. It was a really strange hour for a person like me to pray.

Anastasia Rebello

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Alister Hardy was a marine biologist. When he decided to study religion, he thought: instead of dealing with dogmas and ritual, why don’t we do what we do in the sciences, namely, collect data first and study it? So, he advertised in the secular press, inviting people to send in reports of their religious experiences.

The response was far greater than he expected. Thousands of people wrote, describing their religious experiences—so much so that these were published in several volumes. The centre Hardy set up at Manchester College, Oxford, the Religious Experience Research Unit, continued his work. In an apparently secular country like Britain, there were more people with special experiences which they considered religious.

The first volume, The Spiritual Nature of Man: Study of Contemporary Religious Experience, carried short descriptions sent in by people who had had such experiences. The second volume, The Original Vision, was devoted to the spiritual experience of children. The accounts were written by adults of course, describing the mystical experiences they had had as children.

The world may not be as secular or as “godless” as it may sometimes look!

Fr Joe Mannath SDB

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Continuing from the December issue on the Synod (which is about becoming a mutually listening and caring family of God) we listen to three more church members as they share their experience and views of the church, and their suggestions for becoming what we should be. We start with an educated layman.

1. “Church” for me means:

• The magisterium
• The hierarchy – Cardinals, Bishops, Priests
• The religious orders, including nuns
• Churches (Buildings), Catholic institutions – schools, hospitals, orphanages, homes for the old and infirm, etc.
• Catholic faithful

Desirable: The Kingdom of God as described in Revelations – Triune God, Mother Mary, saints, angels and the faithful in heaven and on earth.

2. My Experiences of Church:

A loving family of faith led by Christ-like leaders?

Yes, in the context of the Pope and teaching of the Church.

No, when it is dominated by pomp and majesty, huge edifices, outdated honorifics used for Cardinals (His Eminence), Archbishops (His Grace) and Bishops (Lordship). Even secular society has done away with most of these. The honorific for the Pope is just a plain ‘Holy Father’!

The hierarchy gives one the impression of pomp and ceremony. The emphasis appears to be on the upkeep of the monuments and church edifices; the spectacular rather than the mundane.

That explains why Mother Teresa and the Missionaries of Charity were much appreciated as true examples of Christ’s teaching and vision of His church. But it was an exception, rather than the norm.

LARRY D’sOUZA

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1. The Church for me is…

The Church reminds me of a mystical body that continues to do the mission of Jesus here in this world. The visible structures of the Church facilitate the fulfillment of Christ’s mission effectively and tangibly. Of course, our members are both saints and sinners who journey together to the heavenly homeland.

2. Church Leadership

In the recent years, I see a big mentality shift from the part of the clergy. I think that top-down structure of the church is slowly beginning to dissolve. We see pastors trying their best to serve the flock. Especially after the sex abuse scandal for which the clergy were accused, Churchmen have become humbler, more authentic and human.

3. Are we what Jesus wanted us to be?

All that the Church does in order to establish the kingdom of God is really praiseworthy. The only one that disturbs me a bit is our division into various denominations. Christ desires one flock under one shepherd. But in general, the Church is discerning its way to understand what Christ wants it to be.

Sathish paul sdb

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1. When you hear or use the word “Church,” what image or idea do you have in your mind? Whom or what does it include?

The idea of family, because all Christ’s followers are children of the same God.

2. Your main experience of the church:

As a loving family of faith led by Christ-like servant leaders who seek the good of the least, and not power;

3. How do you see church leadership?

These two kinds of leadership are present in the Church. there is those who listen and those who want only to exercise power over the others.

I know a priest who used to listen carefully to the lay catechists before taking any decisions. Another priest would do everything by himself without taking in consideration the people around. Once this person told me the people around respect only those who have a big role in the community; to be a simple religious without a post (rector, administrator, etc.) means to be no one.

Edwar gobran sdb

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Did you know that Covid 19 has affected even would-be-saints who died long ago? The bicentenary of the birth of Elizabeth Prout was to be celebrated last September. But, because of the restrictions imposed by the pandemic, the celebrations had to be cancelled. But the Sisters of the Cross and the Passion, the Congregation she founded, requested Bishop Mark Davies of Shrewsbury, England, where she was born, to celebrate a Mass at his cathedral. Bishop Davies said that Elizabeth Prout would have understood the inevitability of these restrictions, since she lived through terrible epidemics that swept the industrial slums in northern England during those years.

Elizabeth Prout was born in Coleham, Shrewsbury, England on 2 September 1820 to an Anglican mother and a father who was a lapsed Catholic. Elizabeth was baptized and brought up in the Anglican Church. In her mid-twenties, when she lived in Stone, Staffordshire, she met Fr Dominic Barberi, an Italian Passionist, now a Blessed. She soon became a Catholic and, a few years later, joined the Sisters of the Infant Jesus at Northampton. But illness forced her to return home where her mother nursed her back to health. Although they knew she had become a Catholic, her parents did not allow her to attend Mass. Forced to make a choice between her family and her faith, Elizabeth left home and made her way to Manchester, looking for work.

Fr M A Joe Antony SJ

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In their book, Born to Win, Muriel James and Dorothy Jongeward introduce the chapter on the human need for recognition and affirmation (strokes) with the words of a nine-year old boy, Bradley, who says,

            “If you touch me soft and gentle,

            If you look at me and smile at me

            If you listen to me talk sometimes before you talk,

            I will grow, really grow.”

            To be recognized, to be affirmed, to be listened to is one of the basic needs of human beings.  This is one of the needs that must be satisfied for people to really grow and blossom.

Our Basic Needs

            Abraham Maslow, an American psychologist, popularized the theory of a hierarchy of needs that have to be satisfied for people to attain psychological health.

Fr Jose Kuttianimattathil SDB

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Fr Prakash was attending a renewal programme. He told the other participants that he had left his former congregation because religious life there was not up to his expectations. There were so many things going wrong in that congregation. Many of the members were not up to the mark, he said. He also disclosed that he had been a theology professor and he had studied under Karl Rahner for some time and later done his doctoral thesis under Hans Küng, the two foremost theologians in the Catholic Church during those years. His current congregation, he often boasted, was very happy and felt privileged to have him as a member and had put him to teach theology. He said his students considered him the best professor at the seminary. He was now on a Sabbatical and his students were quite upset when he left.

It turned out that Fr Prakash had been forced to leave his former religious congregation because those around him couldn’t stand his haughty behaviour and the way he alienated both his professional colleagues and his students. He expected high praise and appreciation for his performance. When that was not forthcoming, he would fish for them asking people how they thought, for example, of a talk he had done.

Fr Jose Parappully SDB

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