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Insights and suggestions of Sr Inigo Joaquim SSA, a former superior general who later worked with prisoners and animated thousands of religious, both in India and abroad. (The interview was conducted by Ms Janina Gomes.)

1. You were Superior General of St. Anne’s Congregation, Chennai, for two terms, 1990-2002. What did your congregation focus on with you at the helm?

At a very young age, I was elected in our 20^th General Chapter as the Leader of the congregation and re-elected in the 21^st General Chapter to relevantly respond to the times. The Spirit-filled General Chapters led the Congregation to commit itself with renewed vigour to rejuvenate the formation, to re-define our spirituality of experiencing God in solidarity with the oppressed, to restructure and decentralize our administration, renew our life-style, deepen our social awareness and boldly and objectively revitalize the existing ministries and to identify relevant front-line ministries. I took the mandate given to me by the Chapter very seriously and considered the deliberations of the Chapter as divine intervention and the demand of the signs of the times and executed them with firmness and determination.

My predecessor and my Team members and many like-minded resource persons played a great supportive role in making my dream of vibrant and dynamic vision and mission a reality. My office as National CRI Secretary for Women’s section gave me fresh impetus to realize the time-bound focus. The CRI addressed the burning issues of that time by selecting apt themes to prepare the religious like, prophetic role of religious, liberation theology, living in the midst of the poor and identification with the poor, joining with the oppressed and fighting for justice issues, empowerment of women, to shun clericalism and being daring and liberated women religious.

My innovative thinking intensified the focus of my Congregation, “Experiencing God in the oppressed.” An integrated initial formation was programmed: Emphasizing the study of Bibilical Prophets and the life of the contemporary Indian Prophets and martyrs, Universal as well as Indian mystics, including Francis Assisi, a day of silence to interiorize the experiences—these were some of the new ventures. The Novices were given rural exposure where they made their first profession which was a historic moment.

Revitalizing on-going formation was also felt by the Congregation as the urgent need. Special focus on the life and the Spirit of our Foundress Gnanamma and interpreting the Charism of our Congregation in the light of the changing times, led to a new way of praying with flexibility. Specific objectives were identified for every ministry and policies were formulated and implemented. Innovative ways were introduced to respond to the needs of the target people. As a way of empowerment and to develop leadership qualities, sisters were trained to direct retreats to our own members and to others outside with the themes: Women, Jesus’ Movement, Inter-personal Relationship, Biblical Mission, etc. A special Yoga Retreat was organized for the whole Congregation. Sisters were encouraged to write books and to address public gatherings. A group of sisters brought out a special book on Education: Hidden truths and alternative values of School syllabus. Sisters also brought out books on “the women of courage”, “Folk art”, “the problems of child labourers”, “Let us save the Earth”, etc.

One memorable event I would like to put on record here during my leadership tenure to empower my sisters which is very much relevant to today’s context is the self defence skill: We were known as Karate Nuns. My genuine aim to allow my nuns to learn this art was not to attack and offend others but to realize our inner energy lying dormant, to improve their power of concentration and to defend oursleves in the wake of sexual harrassment. Karate Master Hussain wrote the following about this event: “This was the first time in the world nuns known for piety and non-violence learnt a martial art.” This was the breaking news all over the world and many international media swooped down on this unknown convent. The Vatican who heard on the ethics of nuns learning Karate remarked: “It is right to know self-defence when the second cheek is slapped too. This made big news.”

2. You were also the only delegate elected by the South Asian Women Religious to the Synod of Bishops in Rome in 1994 ‘ Vita Consecrata’.

When Indian magazines announced my name, I was taken aback with the million-dollar question, “why me?’ There was no such preparation as we are doing now for the Synod 2023. We were called auditrices – only auditors with no voting right. Seating arrangements were made in a strictly hierarchical style.

I have had many enriching positive experiences. When I was at the Synod Hall with Pope John Paul II, Cardinals and Bishops, it was an overwhelming and thrilling experience for me. I felt the belongingness to the Catholic Church where women and men should be equal. The Synadol fathers listened to us and appreciated and acknowledged women’s voice. I took a legitimate pride on being an Indian woman religious.

I was touched by one of the prophetic interventions, of a Bishop: “In the Church, 75% of the consecrated people are women. If there are no women, there is no Consecrated life and no Church also. Hence, the future of the Church depends upon the responsible response we would be giving to women religious. If they don’t feel our support, eventually the Church will lose women too in this century.”

Now the Church under the leadership of Pope Francis is opening to the stark realities of the society and becoming inclusive is the Good News!

3. As a facilitator of General and Provincial Chapters of various congregations and speaker at various gatherings of priests, nuns and lay people, you have had a vast outreach in India and other countries. In what way were you enriched by such an outreach?

I am fully aware of God’s call as His special chosen instrument to proclaim God’s comforting as well as challenging message at various gatherings. Their feedback gave me a new revelation that I am very assertive, and walk the talk style and my sessions are direct, powerful and down to earth, based on the critical analysis and sound interpretation of the Word of God connected to the need of the hour. I cherished the affection and the appreciation of participants from various walks of life. Their perception and affirmation convinced me to speak and write with conviction and authority.

My experiential sharing of ideas and thoughts challenged the traditional mindset and disturbed the mediocre life-style of the participants. Their impressive and positive feedback helped me to acknowledge God’s gifts in me like my innovative thinking, humanism, commitment for a cause, experiencing God’s presence in everyone and clear vision. Indeed I have grown a lot and developed a more positive and friendly approach with others, of course, without compromising Gospel values.

4. You have animated many congregations of religious in India and guided them. You must have a pulse on the religious in India. In what way do you think they could change the way they function in modern times without losing their charism.

I have reached out to more than 120 Congregations – Major Superiors, Bishops, Priests, Seminarians, Religious and the laity both in India and abroad as retreat directress, resource person at seminars, Symposiums, various Forums and Chapter facilitator. I regard it as an amazing and awesome privilege granded to me.

Charism is nothing but listening to the voice of God through the cry of the poor and being disturbed and responding to it creatively in the context.

I firmly believe what Pope Francis says: “It is the Spirit that brings change. Let us allow the Holy Spirit to transform the hearts of religious. We are witnesses to the Gospel”. Let us make the spirit of Pope Francis our own.

I have witnessed the following common global and local challenges Consecrated life is facing: The dwindling of authentic vocations to religious. Multiplying pious exercises without allowing them to transform life is creating an aversion in the hearts of many good religious.

Comfortable and secure middle-class lifestyle, the lack of newness and creativity in approaching ministries, competition for power and positions, the dysfunction in community life, group infighting, misunderstanding and communication gap between authority and community members, create a discomfort to the religious who are seeking meaning and purpose to religious life.

Lack of emotional support and professional counselling when needed, gradually replacing the sense of mission by professionalism and, worse, by careerism and the pursuit of personal ambitions, just being administrators or managers, than being effective animators, individualism, absence of lay partnership, lack of inter-cultural and inter-religious knowledge and dialogue, addiction to modern technology though it is a boon, shocking personal scandals among those in positions: money handling, connection to their family members, not being accountable, justifying their values, taking undue advantage of their position and freedom are some of the glaring truths people are questioning.

Now the time has come for the religious to be serious about being a transforming presence in our present society. The clarion call is given to us to embrace the age-old values of true holiness, contemplation, renunciation and asceticism, detachment and simplicity and stand for truth and justice and face the consequences.

5. You have written two books on the consecrated life: Call to Move Beyond and Ever Evolving Consecrated Life. In what way does religious life evolve?

My two books are the concise summary and the Manifesto of Consecrated Life today. Taking into considertation the reality of the dearth of women writers, I launched into this new vneture to awaken the present generation who do not want to get into this parameter of stagnation.

My first book, Consecrated Life, Called to Move Beyond, consists of  my own personal experiences of religious life at various stages. We know that we are at the crossroad without a clear signposta. Deep down I have been yearning to present a roadmap which could give a clear green signal to Consecrated Life. The positive interaction with various groups in India and abroad (Singapore, Malaysia, Philippines, Hong Kong, China, Japan, Sri Lanka, etc.). have certainly provoked me to think further, especially from a practical point of view to move their life beyond the beaten path and beyond pietistic and legalistic spiritualities.  As people and their thinking are changing, objectives are different and new needs are emerging, we need to discover new roads to walk on and new possibilities to explore.

As the world is alarmed about the pandemic Covid-19, followed by social distancing and lock-down, my second book, Ever Evolving Consecrated Life, emerged. Searching for relevance is an on-going endeavour involving a constant quest to seek, find and carry out the will of God in our life.

As the world order is changing drastically due to the global crisis created by this pandemic, I sincerely feel that there should be an evolution and revolution in the way we live our consecrated life today. I feel the need to leave behind a relevant and rich legacy to the younger generation by nurturing friendship with ecology and living an eco-friendly life-style. As young religious are seeking meaningful and newer forms of living their consecrated life, I am sure the various themes of my book would inspire them to explore and discover newer pastures in the ever-changing times in the contemporary world.

6. After finishing your mission as Superior General, you opted to work at the Tihar Jail in Delhi, which is the largest in Asia, with 20,000 inmates. What made you take that plunge into unfamiliar ground?

The following factors motivated me to plunge into this unfamiliar ground:

My first inspiration was the Word of God: Lk: 4: 18, Mt: 25: 40.

When I was at the Synod, I was impressed by the inspirational message of Mother Teresa: “It is a beautiful gift of God to take care of the people, men and women in jail who are the least. It is something beautiful for God and is a real gift”.

Reading about the prison reforms introduced by Kiran Bedi, the first woman Director General of Prisons at Tihar in Delhi and the way she changed the jail into an Ashram years ago, moved me.

Some of you might still remember having read in the newspapers, regarding the hanging of Ranga and Billa in the Tihar Jail. When the Judge pronounced the death sentence, they literally froze. At the end, the Judge asked them for their last wish, if any. Ranga related a pathetic story. He said: “During my imprisonment, no one from my family visited me. One day a friend of mine came to the jail to convey a terse message from my mother. The message was: ‘Go and tell him that I don’t have a son like him.’” When he shared this, he wept bitterly and said to the Judge: “I have no one to love me here on earth. I am ready to die.” They were hanged on 31^st January, 1982. I was frozen to read this news. This was also another important reason.

I wanted to study from the struggling people and from their real life experiences. My personal questions like: What is the meaning of my religious vocation? Who benefits by my God-given vocation? Can I do what I am doing now without being a religious? What is my special or additional contribution to serve the least and the lost as a religious? Who are the poorest of the poor who needs my intervention?

7. What did you learn from your prison ministry?

Tihar Jail is run by Government of Delhi. The prison complex contains altogether sixteen jails with a capacity of 20,000 inmates. A prison is not a normal place. This is a different world altogether.

A prisoner is a human being without a voice. He is confined in a forty square feet space for eighteen hours a day with no privacy and no dignity. The nature of discipline for the innocent and the under-trials is the same as that of hard-core criminals. Due to over-crowding and congestion, sicknesses spread easily. It is very disgusting to pass time in jails. The design of the buildings, the cells and the walls are such that even a normal person will soon become insane and mentally deranged.

Let us remember what Archbishop Fulton Sheen once told the prisoners: “You are caught, I’m not. That is the difference between you and me”. We all make mistakes but we are given a chance to repent but though the prisoners want to prove themselves good, first time itself the chance is denied because of the special conditions of Indian judiciary. All of them may not be criminals. Some are there as victims of circumstances, many others are wrongly accused or some other reasons like poverty, hunger, unemployment, exploitation, irresponsible parents, peer pressure, wrong formation, no formation etc.

The new outlook on prisoners is: Criminals are not born; society makes them that way! People in prisons are still human beings. People should hate the crime, not the criminals. Some are like fish accidentally caught in the net; and have no chance of escaping.

Some are summarily rejected by their family and have no visitors for months together. This causes tremendous mental agony and gradually leads them into deep depression. Hence we, the NGOs, are considered ‘angels’ in the prison.

According to HR Commission, 40% of the under-trials in the prisons are innocent human beings. Not that I call these prisoners I work with blameless. Rather, I also feel the blame within myself, within the human community that leaves them feeling abandoned and without human worth. To speak to them, to love them and to participate in their human agony is a God –experience. To meet them and spend time with them listening to their agonies who are unlawfully implicated and treat them as our own brothers and sisters is spirituality for me. But who cares for them? Who bothers about them?

Often Pope Francis appeals to the authorities to take practical measures, which are urgently needed to improve the living conditions in the prisons. He is pleading with the Governments to abolish the death penalty, where it is still in force and to reconsider the possibility of an amnesty.

8. Tell us some of the experiences of the prisoners.

Prison Ministry is not about doing miraculous works among the inmates or securing their release from the prison. It is about our presence and availability. A kind word, a listening heart, a gentle touch, a little smile and concerned look do wonders. Our primary purpose of visiting the prisons is to learn from the inmates. They inspire us.

The inmates’ testimony of faith, their knowledge of the Word of God and their sense of gratitude for our presence, etc., strengthened my faith. They are my benefactors. They teach me many truths of life, like the values of hope, endurance, resilience, sense of gratitude, etc., and deepen our own faith experience. Once what a Christian inmate shared with me is unforgettable:

“Sister, we can bring our problems to the notice of God. We can ask Him what we need. But we should not give our suggestions to God. We cannot give our opinion to God. We don’t need to make decisions for God. We should leave God to be God. He will do great things in His time and in His way”. These moments have helped me to see my life differently.

Our loving presence of course instill the inmates with a sense of remorse for the misdeeds that they have committed. The prisoners suffer from utter loneliness and helplessness. Love seems far away from their life. It is to such persons we are reaching out. The love extended to them in the moment of their darkest hour brings healing, joy, peace, hope and the will to go on with mental stability.

During the Season of Christmas and Lent, the Sacrament of Reconciliation and Eucharistic celebrations are being arranged to bring spiritual consolation and strength to our inmates. As for me, it would be a sense of sheer joy and gratitude for being able to bring and share our Lord with them, who are physically imprisoned; sadness as they are so terribly restrained; fear because of the sight of all the chains and locks and enclosures all around.

The Psalms and the lamentations spoke to me, not only about the trial of Jesus 2000 years ago, but also about the court trials endured by our prisoners I work with at Tihar in collaboration with Prison Ministry of India.

     9. In what way can others be involved with such a noble ministry?

Jesus is the founder of Prison Ministry. He inaugurated it on the cross, while He was hanging between those two criminals. He was included in the category of the worst of criminals despite the fact that he was innocent. Hence Prison Ministry is Biblical Ministry, Moral ministry, ethical ministry, human ministry, a spiritual ministry and this is also a Universal Ministry. We can proudly say that this is the only one ministry in the church that involves all sorts of people together–priests, religious, seminarians, lay men and women. Even religious congregations are now contemplating about front-line and relevant ministries. I strongly recommend this ministry to religious where we don’t give much but we gain and learn a lot for our life.

We need to have certain characteristics to involve in this noble ministry.

We have to be persons of non-judgmental and compassion with sustained interest and perseverance: Many show enthusiasm in getting the jail entry pass and visiting the inmates in the excitement for a month and then many lose the original interest and initial zeal. It is not simply a work that we can do there because we are retired or have nothing else to do or we are emotionally charged after attending some seminar about prison ministry. Let there be continuity, and one should be ready to spend quality time with them and listen to their pathetic and heart-rending stories with love and care.

Many have deep seated anger, feelings of revenge, frustration and even suicidal and homicidal tendencies. Counseling them and providing psychological help is important. One can get free legal aid from Advocates friends to help them to get a bail or to be acquitted and also rendering some financial and moral support, when they are released. We can provide medical assistance too with the help of doctors. We can contact their family members by direct visit or through telephones and make efforts to bring reconciliation with their family members.

Arranging for their spiritual needs like Eucharistic celebration, confession and prayer services and Bible- study groups. They often ask for our prayers. They believe that the Lord of history can change their destiny. They have lost everything. But, they say, they can’t afford to lose God. Our assurance of prayers for these unfortunate brothers and sisters will go a long way in removing their feelings of guilt and helplessness and bring hope in their hopeless lives.

What the inmates need is our compassionate presence. Our presence brings them lots of healing and hope and conversion of hearts. They consider us as angels. One inmate said: “If I had met you earlier, I wouldn’t be here in the prison”. Prison ministry is primarily a Ministry of Presence. Our mere presence changes their mood of helplessness. Our presence makes them feel that they have still somebody to care for them and that they are, after all, not forgotten.

Prison Officials admit: “Your language of forgiveness and mercy to the inmates is different from our harsh and crude language. They crave to listen to your soothing voice. Only you can do it.”

Their self-esteem is low. They need to be encouraged. They need to be given hope. Find the broken hearts in dark places searching for the light. Negative words and sometimes even about their own families disown us. The key role is to enable prisoners to see the good things in themselves.

10. Anything else you would like to add?

Call to Consecrated life is a grace and a blessing too. But the context of Covid-19 invites us to set right our priorities. This is the time to relook into ourselves and make a sincere introspection of every area of our life and make a paradigm shift. To live a witnessing consecrated life is not complicated or difficult. Our Spirituality is simple. We may have to distinguish between our out-modelled practices of celebrating liturgy, our meaningless celebrations and rituals, our traditional way of running institutions and the fear to launch into new way of living our life courageously. We are not doing anything extra as a religious in our life, if we are not getting out of our comfort zone and cast the net deep into the sea and experience the troubled waters.

May we move from mountain to multitude, from withdrawal to involvement, from dumb silence to passionate service and from merely saying prayers to people experience and from vertical to horizontal relationship. Let us get ready to go through a kind of death experience to start everything afresh. It is time to ask the Spirit: “Come, Oh Holy Spirit! Set our hearts on fire!”

May the freshness of the Holy Spirit blow away unwanted, secondary and non-essential elements from our life and make us Mystics and Missionaries, Message and Messengers, Deeply God-experienced and Prophetic witnesses in our times and in our context.

May this prayer from Upanishads, “Lead us from untruth to truth, from darkness to light and from mortality to immortality” be our guiding inspiration.

“Into that heaven of freedom, my Father and Mother, let our Consecrated Life awake”! (Tagore)

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Sr Inigo Joaquim SSA

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Father Stu

Writer/ Director: Rosalind Ross * Cast: Mark Wahlberg, Mel Gibson, Jacki Weaver, Teresa Ruiz (124 minutes)

A fun loving boisterous, agnostic amateur boxer from a dysfunctional family, chaser after earthy glory and pleasure, Stuart Long was the least likely candidate for Catholic priesthood. But that is exactly what this film tells us about! Stuart Long was brought up in a dysfunctional family that suffered the trauma of the death of one of the children in childhood, a mostly absentee, alcoholic, abusive father Bill and a naïve, failed mother Kathleen. Religion was never in the picture. Yearning for recognition, he becomes an athlete specializing in boxing, but sustaining lot of injuries and not much money.  He moves to Hollywood, dreaming of stardom and makes a living working in a supermarket, where his meeting with a Latino Sunday school teacher named Carmen changes his life. She insists that she will only date a Catholic, which makes him pretend to be interested in the church. He joins a catechism programme to impress her. Soon he gets serious with the faith and gets baptized and begins dating Carmen. Still struggling with his alcoholism, Stu gets involved in a deadly road accident and is near death. During this trauma he has a vision of Virgin Mary which lifts up his spirit and heals him. Stu develops a feeling that God has given him a second chance. He feels he is called to priesthood so he could help people like him. He prefers marriage with Carmen to the priesthood, but after prayer and discernment decides to pursue the seminary. Carmen discourages him. His parents are scandalized. Unfazed by the initial rejection by the seminary authorities, Stu’s personal appeal to the rector succeeds. Half way through his seminary studies, he is diagnosed with a rare debilitating disease, disqualifying him for ordination.  This opens a new chapter of questioning God and of eventual acceptance of suffering as a gift, with grace and dignity. Forced to leave the seminary, he returns home, to be cared for by his parents. However, even in his disease, he refuses to give up hope and under the petitions of his fellow parishioners, he is ordained and serves as an exemplary pastor. He served as priest and counselor till his death in 2014 aged 50.

The Cut

Director: Fatih Akin * Tahar Rahim, Simon Abkarian, Hindi Zahra, Kevork Malikyan (2014; 128 minutes)

Set against the historic Armenian Genocide of the World War I, the film presents a variety of themes including religious persecution, racism, separation and loss, crisis of faith. The film is focused on the problem of evil that infects the victim and the victimizers.  In 1915 the disintegrating Ottoman Empire unleashed brutal persecution and extermination of Armenian Christians. The young blacksmith Nazareth Manoogian living peacefully in the village of Mardin with his wife and two girls is arrested one night by armed guards and taken to a slave labour camp in the desert where he  experiences the savagery of the Ottoman cruelty firsthand. One night a Turkish officer offers to free those who convert to Islam. The few who accept are taken away.  Those who refuse, including Nazareth are taken to be killed. Their executioners are other prisoners. Nazareth’s executioner only wounds his throat – rendering him dumb—to make the soldiers think his throat is cut, and returns at night to rescue him from among the murdered. Nazareth remains dumb till the climactic moments of his seven-year-long, dangerous quest for his lost family, across the Syrian Desert to Lebanon, Cuba and finally to America. Nazareth hates God and tries to erase the cross-tattoo from his hand and throws stones at heaven.   In a hellish camp in the desert, he meets his sister-in-law dying of starvation. She asks him to kill her as an act of mercy. He obliges, but is overcome with deep sorrow and guilt. During a chance meeting, an old fellow villager informs him that the Armenian is at the border town of Ras Al Ain. Fighting the certainty of his family having perished, he continues the search. In one of the refugee homes he sees the photograph of his two daughters who are gone to Lebanon. The orphanage headmistress in Lebanon informs him that they have migrated to Cuba. Nazareth travels to Cuba, and from there to Florida, USA. He narrowly escapes being shot as an intruder, steals a ride on a train and finally arrives in North Dakota, ending his journey on a mixed note of joy and sorrow.  Even in his suffering Nazareth shows his essential humanity when he refuses to throw stones at the Ottoman soldiers returning humiliated from the battlefront while others around him do.

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Prof Gigy Joseph

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3:16: The Numbers of Hope

By Max Lucado

(2022)

The author describes his latest best-seller as the “most famous conversation in the Bible” and “a twenty-six –word-parade of hope beginning with God, ending with life, and urging us to do the same.”  “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish, but have eternal life.”(John 3:16). Lucado calls it the “hope Diamond of the Bible,” and brings out its implications. The context is the famous night encounter between Nicodemus and the Lord. The author speaks of it in an intensely personal way:  “Every time I recall these words, they are fresh and as stunning as my first encounter with them. The mind-bending awareness of God’s limitless love, his incalculable sacrifice, and the priceless teaching at the core. How can we not review it again and again? I want this generation, and all who come after, to look closely at the key promise of God and choose the gift beyond all gifts.” Every person can take courage to face up to the setbacks and despairs of life recalling the verse. We know that things will turn out well for us because “God so loved the world.” The book begins with the dramatization of the curious Jewish scholar seeking out the Galilean “crowd-stopper.” The two are on two sides of “the Continental Divide of Scripture.” Nicodemus, the well-meaning sincere Jew, believes in giving God his best and hopes that God will do the rest. But Jesus takes him to the next level, insinuating that his efforts are not enough, even if they are the finest and makes the enigmatic demand: “Unless you are born again, you can’t inhabit the Kingdom of God.” The heart of the human problem is the human heart. What it implies is this: “He loves, He gave, We believe, We live.”  Part II is a series of short reflections recalling the first part entitled ‘Only Jesus:  40 Days with the Son’. In these we are engaged in a reflective journey from the birth to the final exhortations of the Lord after Resurrection. Lucado concludes the final reflection: “The same one who saved your soul longs to remake your heart. God is willing to change us into the likeness of the Saviour. Shall we accept his offer? ”

The Fulfillment of All Desire: A Guidebook for the Journey to God Based on the Wisdom of the Saints

By Ralph Martin

(2006)

Ralph Martin is a leading American Catholic evangelist, widely published author, theologian and president of Renewal Ministries. Pope Benedict XVI appointed him as an expert for the World Synod of Bishops on the New Evangelization in 2012. Martin’s book draws upon the teaching of seven great spiritual doctors and mystics of the Church – St Augustine, St John of the Cross, St Teresa of Ávila, St Catherine of Siena, St Bernard of Clairvaux, St Thérèse of Lisieux and St Francis De Sales – to explain the Biblical world view in light of the lives and writings of these heroes and heroines the Church. These saints addressed the issues of their times. The author particularly recalls the trials of St Teresa of Ávila and St John of the Cross, whose attempted to reform the monastic orders. We may be drifting along with the contemporary culture and its thinking, which can lead us away from truth and happiness, trapping us in falsehood and destruction. Quoting St Bernard, the author notes that if we want to arrive at happiness—the fulfillment of all desire rather than destruction or perpetual frustration—we need to take a different road, the road that leads us to enter through the gate that opens to heaven. The book provides encouragement and spiritual direction for all those who yearn to know, love, and serve the Lord. A three-stage pattern of development is traced in the lives of the saints mentioned, designating them as “Purgative”, “Illuminative” and “Unitive.” Different saints use different imagery to designate their experiences. Thus, Teresa of Ávila uses the image of ‘seven mansions’. The final or Unitive stage signifies habitual union with God, deep joy, profound humility, freedom from fears of suffering or trials, great desire to serve God and apostolic fruitfulness. “Fear of God” is not the fear of a tyrannical, impetuous, arbitrary and punitive God. God is the healing transformative force acting upon our thought, desire and action. Its attainment is contingent on human choice, the choice of our own destiny.

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Prof Gigy Joseph

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 Faith never knows where it is being led, but it loves and knows the One who is leading. – Oswald Chambers

God is looking for willing hearts… God has no favorites. You do not have to be special, but you have to be available.

– Winkie Pratney

 Wicked men obey from fear; good men, from love.

– Augustine

Taking up my “cross” means a life voluntarily surrendered to God.

– A. W. Pink

Wherever you are, be all there. Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God.

– Jim Ellio

 The will of God for your life is simply that you submit yourself to Him each day and say, “Father, Your will for today is mine. Your pleasure for today is mine. Your work for today is mine. I trust You to be God. You lead me today and I will follow.”

– Kay Arthu

Maturity comes from obedience, not necessarily from age.

– Leonard Ravenhil

 Nine-tenths of the difficulties are overcome when our hearts are ready to do the Lord’s will, whatever it may be. When one is truly in this state, it is usually but a little way to the knowledge of what His will is.

– George Mueller

 It is Christ who is to be exalted, not our feelings. We will know Him by obedience, not by emotions. Our love will be shown by obedience, not by how good we feel about God at a given moment. “And love means following the commands of God.” “Do you love Me?” Jesus asked Peter. “Feed My lambs.” He was not asking, “How do you feel about Me?” for love is not a feeling. He was asking for action.

– Elisabeth Elliot

 A ton of prayer will not produce what an ounce of obedience will.

– Ed Cole

I’m not perfect in my walk but I want to do the right thing.

– Kirk Cameron

 You cannot obey God without your obedience spilling out in a blessing to all those around you.

– Adrian Rogers

Joy, not grit, is the hallmark of holy obedience. We need to be light-hearted in what we do to avoid taking ourselves too seriously. It is a cheerful revolt against self and pride.

– Richard J. Foster

 If you look up into His face and say, “Yes, Lord, whatever it costs,” at that moment He’ll flood your Life with His presence and power.

– Alan Redpath

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May Magnet cover page is magnifying and electrifying, in other words tempting/inspiring.

Inspiration (quotes) on Celibacy has excellent quotes of various persons.

Editorial: In his unique way, the editor puts across the beauty and meaning of Consecrated Life, quoting and inviting live testimonies.

Sr. Lini reveals that there are very good and kind persons in and around us who are willing to make sacrifices in order to reach out to the poor in need.

‘Encouragement does wonders’ by Fr. Jose Kuttianimattathil (Tips for Superiors), is very encouraging and enlightening.. as it is supporting someone struggling and affirming one’s achievement; his practical tips to encourage are very stimulating.

Sr. Navya has dealt judiciously and compassionately with the case of expectation or demand made by religious leaving the society/congregation. Today it is happening more and often. Congregations/Societies need to be alert.

Life on the Margins: That there is a search for feeling dignified or feeling whole even in the so called worst of the persons in the society is well exposed in the article ‘Looking for wholeness’ by Bro. Carmel. Is this life of prostitution the opposite of or enemy of celibate life or are these persons held up or those who choose  to live such life out of necessity or force opposites and enemies to  religious persons today! Food for thought!

Celibacy today: In all his simplicity and honesty, the auhor reveals and opens the Pandora box of our religious life, based on three vows  and exposes its possible irrelevance  and relevance as well in today’s context. He gives a transparent understanding of human sexuality and how to understand and handle it carefully, safely and contextually, for  both women and men religious. The statistics that 53% + of children have gone through sexual trauma is an indication and caution to better understand the individuals, specially joining religious or priestly life and guide them in their true vocation they are created and meant  for. His explanation on what Celibacy is and what it is and how to be a celibate by life is   very mind blowing and simply enlightening with various live examples. He defines celibacy in simple words as ‘A HEART RULED AND SUSTAINED BY LOVE’ for God and people. Celibates are to be the  inspiring models and joyful witnesses people can look up to and get guidance from. Well, the deep question he invites us to pose to ourselves is whether we are mere spinsters and bachelors or really joyful religious persons!! Who and what we are passionate about matters a lot in our celibate life. Is the present style of vocation promotion merely to gather a work force,  a type of recruitment process to manage the institute and  to work with a hook  or is it  to serve with love? Thanks, Joe, for this enlightening discussion on the most crucial aspect of life and for answering certain basic questions on celibate life. The answers are down to earth and realistic.

Testimonies are really enriching and inspiring and so we have had in the May issue many personal journeys shared well by various religious persons:

Sr. Esme in her personal journey as a religious fascinates the readers with her vocation story and with the natural way of responding to the Call and finding ways to stay on even in turmoil with conviction. There is a call in and to every person to live the plan and will of god.

Bro. Peter Swaminathan very spiritually motivates us in his personal journey as religious, quoting well the life style of the two nightingales of the indian catholic church—Mother Teresa and Bro. Andrew, who lived the corporal works of mercy and  spiritual works of mercy respectively..

Fr. Panneer Selvam, in his journey as a priest,  states that it is being faithful to   and living the spirituality of  one’s conscience is a way to live religious  and celibate life, guided by the Holy Spirit and friends and companions. Let us wake up and intrude our conscience.

In ‘Why be celibate,’ Bro. Amalan  has manuscripted well saying that celibacy is a gift rather than a choice. It is a liberating gift as it leads to a greater love of God and neighbour without comparison. Celibate life is totally based on the daily encounter with God for a meaningful relationship with people entrusted.

The Doctor writer of ‘a call to greater love’ testifies beautifully  that we all belong to God and Him alone, as it is a grace of God. Celibacy is in being in love with God and there is joy in living this life even in our work and in our relationship with people. Her relevant reference to the great spiritual friends, St. Francis de Sales and Madame de Chantal is very timely as the Missionaries of St. Francis de Sales and Salesians of Don Bosco and others  celebrate the Year of Saint Francis de Sales on his 400^th death anniversary (1622-2022). It is worthwhile reading his two classical books Introduction to Devout life and Love of God.

In the sixth and the last testimony in this issue by Mr. Gangai Victor on ‘Something happened’ speaks very explicitly and powerfully about something that really happened  in his life and  of the conversion he went through in becoming a charismatic. It has transformed his daily life, his marriage and dealings and relationships at home and otherwise. He has found God in his life and placed his life in God.

‘We are all humans –and sisters and brothers’ by Fr. Joe Antony invites our focus and attention on ordinaries and little people, for they too matter like the tiny stars in the sky. He brings persons like Regis and Marc into broad daylight for they follow the Master who said , ‘Whatever you do to the least of my sisters and brothers, you do to me.’

Fr. Alex G, on ‘Finance’ has very succinctly explained how to handle accounts and how to be accountable to Trust matters, among the various conflicts of interest which may certainly arise. It needs honesty, transparency, detachment from self and selfish interests and caution. Thanks, Alex, for inviting the trustees to be responsible persons.

Fr. Jose Parappully  in and though his lesson on Paranoid Personality Disorder (PPD), continues to prove to be an author par excellence and authoritative on the matters of psychology. It is a must to learn to respect and understand persons as they are from their perspectives and temperaments. It saves relationships,

On the whole, the May 2022 issue of  MAGNET is a very  comprehensively formative one, touching all spheres of life, spiritual, social, human, physical and psychological, intellectual, sexual, relational etc. Kudos and three cheers (in this hot summer!) and congratulations to the Editor.

Healthy International Day of Nurses (12 May) and Happy International Day of Families (15 May)!

Fr Vincent Swamy MSFS, Pune, Maharashtra

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An adult marked by compassionate concern, or a hidden politician playing power games?

Seeking Downward or upward mobility—seeking to be close to the weakest and raise them up, or to catch up with the rich and powerful?

Katherine was a novice in her religious order when I got to know her in Boston. She was in her mid-thirties, and was a professional pianist. Since I did not have a car, she would come, pick me up and we would go together to attend programmes.

One day, I asked her: “Do you have to get someone’s permission to take the car and come out?”

Her reply surprised me, as I think it will surprise you:

“No, that is my responsibility as an adult. But since I am taking this car,  I will leave that info in writing in the community room; so the others know I am taking this car out today.”

I asked her one more question: “When you get back to your community tonight, do you have to inform someone?”

“No, that is my responsibility as an adult.”

I am talking of a novice in a women’s congregation. This happened in the 1980’s.

With my Indian upbringing in religious life, I was surprised to hear her replies.

Young people are brought up differently in different cultures. Young religious are treated differently in different countries.

We, in India, have a rather authoritarian culture. In families, parents make many decisions concerning their sons and daughters—at times even about the choice of the marriage partner. We tend to bring this way of doing into religious life, too, and think this is the only way of living our religious life. (Some of you will notice that I avoid the term, “Consecrated Life.” The reason is simple: If Baptism is what consecrates us, as we say in the formula of professions, our parents and married siblings are consecrated, just as we are. Our call is not superior to theirs.)

It is good to know that what you and I have been used to is not the only way of living religious life, nor the best.

The essentials—whether of the Catholic faith or of religious life or marriage—are taught by the Universal Church. But the interpretations vary a lot—from one culture to another and from one religious order to another, and even from one superior to another!

That is why it is good—even essential—to be exposed to different religious orders and different cultures. Otherwise, we tend to absolutize what is really relative and partial, and miss the chance of learning from others.

In the message he gave on May 8, Pope Francis invites us to celebrate the differences. May we be open to all vocations, and rejoice at the differences. His message insists also on understanding vocation correctly—as a gift God gives to everyone, not just to some groups.

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This is our third issue on the vows. May it help us to understand the vow of obedience correctly, and become truly “obedient” men and women. Obedience comes from the Latin word, ob-audire, which means “to listen intently.” May we truly listen deeply, with our whole heart and mind, to what the Lord, in his love, wants to tell us, and to listen compassionately to the cries of the poor and the weak. If this double “listening with love” is missing, there is no point in being part of a structure which has rules, superiors, time-tables, transfers, etc. Simply letting someone else take decisions for me, or keeping quiet when I should speak, would reduce me to an immature and irresponsible adult who behaves more like a frightened adolescent than a grown-up

Any setting can be used to become better or worse, mature or irresponsible. May our vow of obedience help us become passionate seekers and compassionate healers, full of creative ideas to build a world of love.

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Fr Joe Mannath SDB

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In the past thirty years or so, I have given seminars on “Psycho-Sexual Integration and Celibacy” to a few thousand religious all over India. We look at the meaning of human sexuality, its God-given beauty, power and impact, and ways of becoming mature women and men. We then go on to examine the meaning and implications of this somewhat strange choice some of us make, namely, life-long celibacy, which implies saying No to two of life’s deepest and most life-giving experiences—spousal love and parenthood. The meaning of this way of life is less and less clear today, not only to those of other faiths, but even to Catholics, since many married people do the kinds of work and spiritual services that celibates do.

Two big socio-economic changes have affected the number of celibates drastically: smaller families and higher standards of living. When families were larger—with five to ten children—it was no big deal for a family that one or more daughters or sons chose celibate priesthood or religious life. When the number of children is two, parents—even devout Catholics—are not keen that the kids choose religious life or priesthood. This has happened all over the world.

Of the three vows Catholic religious make, the most striking is celibacy. It really makes us clearly different from most human beings. As for poverty, most of us do not really live poor lives of deprivation. Our living standards are comfortable, like those of the middle class, and, at times even the upper middle class. We are financially more secure than most people in India.
As for obedience, every person—whether a bus driver or manager in an IT firm—is under some form of authority. It is celibacy that sets us apart.

Young religious who attend college are generally bombarded with questions from classmates: “You don’t like girls/boys? Won’t you miss sex? Don’t you want to have children? How can you live like this? Come on, this is not possible! You look normal; why don’t you marry? You can do social work as a married person; why stay single?”

Very understandable questions. Normal and sensible.

1. HUMAN SEXUALITY

1. Sexuality—my being a man or a woman—affects us in the way we think, behave, relate, and even pray. We exist as women and men, not as pieces of furniture with no emotions. There is no moment of the day when I am not a man or woman. My being a man or woman is not restricted to any particular activity, but constitutes what I am.

2. Sexuality is at the root of some of the most beautiful and central realities of life. Without it, we would not have a family, or mother and father, brothers and sisters. Much of the world’s art and literature are inspired by man-woman love. The two deepest and most lasting emotions human beings can experience are man-woman love and parental feeling. Both are rooted in sexuality. When I say that God created me, what I mean is: God endowed my mother and father with normal bodies and sexual passion. Hence, we should never refer to sexuality or marriage as something negative, or lower, or less holy.
3. There is no evidence that more prayerful persons have weaker sexual feelings, or that those with stronger sexual feelings are not spiritual. Just as a good and generous person can struggle with hot temper, a deeply spiritual person can have strong sexual feelings. On the other extreme, just because I have no great sexual battles, I need not be a good celibate; I may be mean, cruel or cold, or wallowing in mediocrity.

4. Men and women differ in the way they experience sexuality—and the ages at which sexual feelings are most intense. Most men—seminarians, for instance—experience strong sexual desires in their teens and twenties (and later). Many women—candidates and young religious, for example—can join the convent without experiencing strong sexual feelings, and find that, years later, when they are in their 30s or 40s, and already in their final vows, they experience stronger sexual feelings than they did in their teens or twenties. They need help and guidance, and a safe setting to understand what is happening, and how to grow through it. This longing need not mean that the woman made a wrong choice. But she needs someone to talk this over with, to learn to integrate sexuality in her celibate life, or to make other choices, if that is better.

5. Cultures differ very much in their understanding of what is right and proper in sexuality or man-woman relationships or modesty. If a religious or priest works in a culture different from the one in which he grew up, he/she needs to understand that culture, rather than judge it by the criteria of one’s original culture. What one culture considers normal may be unacceptable in another setting (e.g., dating). What one group abhors may be more accepted elsewhere (e.g., children born out of wedlock).

6. Individuals differ greatly in the intensity of their sexual feelings. Just as two women or two men can differ in intelligence or humour or cheerfulness, they can differ in sex drive. We need to understand and help individuals.
7. More persons—especially women—have been victims of sexual abuse than earlier believed. Sexual abuse (sexual activity of an adult with a minor) takes place mostly in the family, and has very serious emotional consequences. Much of it is covered up by the family. According to the estimate of the Indian Ministry for Women and Children, 53% of children in India are sexually abused. This is a very high percentage. More people need healing than we think. Many survivors of abuse are afraid of speaking about it.

8. Gender equality is a question of justice, and a measure that will benefit all of us. Both in society and in the church, women are still not treated as respected equals. A recent survey in India showed, for instance, that a significant number of both men and women approve of marital violence by the husband in certain situations! Our formation houses should include good courses on women’s issues and feminist contributions.

9. We all need to relate to both men and women. Without such normal contacts, we are emotionally mutilated and increase, rather than diminish, problems in celibate living. More and more settings—of both studies and ministry—are mixed, and this is a healthy change. In this new setting, we need to train celibate men and women how to develop healthy relationships that make them open to more and more people. In training programmes for religious, for instance, I prefer a mixed group any day over an all-male or all-female group.
10. SPOUSAL LOVE AND PARENTHOOD are among life’s best things, and a holy vocation. You need very good reasons for saying No to them, and staying single. Just to teach or be a nurse or do social work or write accounts or be a principal—none of these jobs is a good enough reason for choosing celibacy. Plus: just staying single to do some work is not the meaning of celibacy. What is it, then?

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Fr Joe Mannath SDB

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By its very nature, any charitable trust is a legal body created to serve the public. A public trust does not belong to any particular individual or the group of office bearers (trustees). Being a public trust, all assets and funds are meant for the benefit of the beneficiaries of the trust. Trustees are mere custodians or administrators of the assets and funds, and not the owners. Hence, they are expected to demonstrate the highest form of accountability and commitment to perform their duties with personal integrity. This implies an inherent obligation to conduct all affairs of the trust transparently and above reproach. This is the only way to gain public trust and confidence.  Therefore, trustees are to exercise their office with utmost sincerity and care, xo that their only concern is the interest and well-being of the trust and not their personal benefit.  The interest and well-being of the trust must be the top priority and all purchases and sales of goods and services must be for the benefit of the trust and its beneficiaries, and not for one’s own benefit.

What is Conflict of Interest?

In the context of the trust, “conflict of interest(s)” is a situation in which a trustee, who has the responsibility for promoting the interest and wellbeing of the trust, is faced with another competing interest (self-interest) benefitting oneself at the same time.  The former is called a fiduciary interest and the latter a competing interest. A situation when a trustee is faced with the fiduciary interest as well as the competing interest leads to conflict of interest. A conflict of interest arises when we are required, in our official capacity, to decide on something in which we have a private interest. It could be a situation in which we are in a position to derive personal benefit from actions or decisions made in our official capacity as a trustee or head of an organization. For example, we are on the decision-making board and one of our family members or friends is an applicant for a job there, or one of them is bidding for a big contract.  It can also be a situation where we want to buy a property from or sell the trust property to our relative.  It can also be a situation when we want to buy supplies from our relative’s shop or company. Thus, we can see that conflict comes when decisions must be taken on issues in which the decision-giver and the decision-seeker are overtly or covertly related or associated. A conflict of interest is not, in and of itself, either unethical or illegal, for we find ourselves in a conflict of interest, not for any action of our own. What matters here is how we handle the situation. Hence, being faced with a conflict situation in itself means nothing. There’s nothing wrong with being in a conflict of interest. What is important and crucial is how we deal with it. It all depends on what choice or decision we make. It’s best to avoid conflicts when we can, disclose them when they occur, and keep ourselves off from the relevant decision if possible.

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Fr Alex G. SJ

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 “I was on the verge of leaving the congregation,” said Brother Ajeesh, recalling the weeks after the death of this father. “My father died three years ago, leaving behind my mother, my elder sister and me.  My mother is a housewife and my sister was yet to be settled.  According to the traditions of our place, it was now my duty to look after the family.  In fact, many suggested that I leave.  But one of the priests in the community where I had done my regency would call me almost daily and encourage me.  The provincial too would call me often and support me.  If not for their support and encouragement, I would have left.  Now, three years later, my sister is well settled, and my brother-in-law is such a good person that he takes care of my mother as if she were his own mother.  Things could not be better.”  What helped Ajeesh to outlive that difficult time and persevere was encouragement.

What is Encouragement?

“…what an amazing gift we can offer to others through encouragement! When we ‘en-courage’, it’s as though we actually infuse courage into another person. Encouragement can provide people with strength to look ahead, move forward, and reach for the next goal. The whole emotional tone of a tough situation can be transformed through encouragement.” (Julie Exline)

            The word “encourage” is made up of en + courage, that is to “make” or “put in” “courage, heart.”  So, to encourage literally means to “cause or create courage, to hearten.”  To encourage is “to inspire with courage, spirit, or confidence” or “to stimulate by assistance, approval, etc.”   When we reflect, we realize that what prevents us from attempting or doing something is either fear or lack of confidence.  There may be in us fear of failure, of ridicule, of rejection, of punishment, of the unknown, or of the future.  And often we lack confidence in ourselves, in our abilities, in our strengths, in others, in the system.  Thus, the fear of failure prevents us from doing something new. The fear of ridicule prevents us from sharing a new idea. The fear of rejection prevents us from trying new friendships. Lack of confidence in ourselves prevents us from taking new initiatives; lack of confidence in others prevents us from attempting common ventures.  We realize that it is often lack of confidence in ourselves and in our abilities that prevent us even from making the effort to correct or improve ourselves.

To encourage is to do whatever is needed to enable persons to overcome fear and lack of confidence. Encouragement takes two forms: supporting someone who is struggling, and affirming someone who has accomplished something.

            With encouragement, people are able to do things which they ordinarily might not do.  With encouragement, children are able to study better, community members are able to correct themselves, team members are able to give their best.  With encouragement, people reach their full potential and blossom.  Without encouragement, they remain underdeveloped and stunted.

This places a huge responsibility on each of us: “Could it be that those around me have not reached their full potential because I have not encouraged them sufficiently?”

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 Fr Jose Kuttianimattathil SDB

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Ronald is a midlevel manager at a private firm. Though very competent at his job, his colleagues and subordinates find him very reserved. He communicates very little with them and shares little information about himself. He often accuses them of trying to scuttle his promotion possibilities. He feels they are jealous of him. When anyone at office points out any failure on his part, he holds them responsible for those same failures and makes counteraccusations. He maintains a kind of closed, defensive and mistrustful position with them, as well as with those above him in the chain of command. This happens all the more if he perceives that they are a threat to his independence. Moreover, his tactlessness and attitudes of superiority, arrogance, and grandiosity antagonize people around him.

He is suspicious of his neighbours. He frequently keeps a watch on them secretly and maintains a distance from them. He suspects his wife of infidelity and accuses her of not loving him but other men. He does not like her socializing with anyone. When he returns home from any trip outside, he sniffs the air to pick up any trace of men’s perfumes and scrutinizes the room for telltale signs of the presence of men in the house….

Ronald’s brief profile shows him as suffering from paranoid personality disorder.

DYNAMICS AND CHARACTERISTICS

1. Suspicion

Inordinate suspicion is the distinctive feature of the paranoid personality disorder. Those who suffer from it are unwarrantedly skeptical and mistrusting of the motives of others. They look for hidden meanings and motives in others’ behaviour. They tend to interpret even innocuous incidents as signifying hidden or conspiratorial intent. This they do especially with those who do not appreciate them or criticise them

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FR JOSE PARAPPULLY SDB

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