I was twenty-twp, a final year MBA student, when I willingly attended a retreat for the first time. My two previous retreats were mandatory ones organized by the educational institutions I studied in. My rebellious streak ensured 100% resistance to whatever happened in those programmes!
This retreat, though—a neighbouring parish event preached by resources from the Divine Retreat Center—was different. I woke up the morning of the first day hearing a voice in my head, “go to the retreat!” This voice was persistent and sort of irresistible. I still remember a part of me thinking, “I’m going mad with hallucinations”, when I stepped into the church.
At that time, I was the first to ridicule spiritual folks—especially the charismatics. I took great pleasure in cracking jokes at their expense! I was never a serious Christian, and religion seemed like a futile exercise in ‘salvation by fear’ more than anything else, and I wanted no part in it.
And yet, something happened during this retreat. The voice in my head wouldn’t relent until I responded to the preaching and the worship. And, during the final adoration session, this voice kept challenging me to give up the many gods in my life—love of money, music, hatred of certain people, and so on. I ended up surrendering my life to Jesus and experiencing His presence. The encounter was tangible… almost physical… so real and unforgettable. It was like becoming a vessel, and God was pouring His presence into me, filling me with a crazy joy and awareness of Him.
Never the Same Again
I just knew I would never be the same again in those moments. God transformed me into what I had mocked the most till then—a charismatic Christian. God has a brilliant sense of humour, I guess!
Gangai Victor
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