In 2000, as I began my studies at Catholic Theological Union in Chicago, I was informed that one of the requirements of participating in the Masters program was to begin meeting with a spiritual director. Without any clear understanding of what this might entail or what was required of me, I obtained the name of a woman who had just recently completed her certificate as a Spiritual Director. At our first meeting, she explained that she was not there so much to ‘direct’ me as to ‘accompany’ me on my faith journey. With very few guidelines and parameters, we started to meet on a monthly basis until I became increasingly frustrated with what I perceived as a lack of direction on her part, and certainly confusion on mine as to what sort of conversations we were supposed to be having. After a few months, she and her husband moved out of town and I needed to find another person to accompany me on my faith journey.
My next spiritual director was a former nun who was a very kind and loving woman. Unfortunately, I quickly realized that she had some major issues with the Catholic Church, specifically with the male-dominated hierarchy. The advice she gave me often centered on the need for change in the spiritual practices of the church and the role that I, as a woman, would need to make to move the Church forward. This left me with feelings of confusion rather than encouragement. Ultimately, due to her physical illness, I needed to find another person to fill the role of spiritual director. Some months later, I started meeting with my pastor, whose approach seemed very judgmental and harsh. Much later, I realized that the wisdom that he had regarding my spiritual life was sound, but the manner in which he presented that wisdom was so off-putting that I dreaded continuing.
To read the entire article, click Subscribe
Crystal and Kevin Sullivan
