Advent:
When Pope Francis spoke to prisoners in Central America, he began by saying, “Standing before you is a man who has experienced much forgiveness.”
We all need forgiveness. We need to come back home. We need to strengthen our good side, and weaken our weak side.
Many Catholics “give up” something during Advent and Lent: Meat and fish, alcohol, extra amusements. Actually, the “giving up” required in a time of preparation—for Christmas or Easter—is not mostly about food and drink. It is about correcting (giving up) our bad habits.
We can fast from gossip, from laziness, from unnecessary expenses and use the money to help the poor.
We can fast from bad habits—excessive eating or drinking, wasting time on TV, accessing pornography (if we have that destructive habit), compulsive shopping.
Christmas:
Move from the four small C’s (crib, cards, carols, cake) to the big C: Christ, who became one of us out of love for us.
Five suggestions:
- List the ten (or 15 or 20) persons who mean the most to you. Do not take them for granted. Thank God for each one.
- At Christmas, write or say a personal word to each of them—not a routine “Merry Christmas.” Example: Write a WhatsApp message to your mother, saying: “I learned so many good things from you, especially your compassion towards the poor. I remember the time when you….”
- Visit (or write a personal note to) people who feel left out—older relatives, sick people, seniors living alone or in homes.
- Invite a poorer family for a meal on or around Christmas. Or pay for their meal in a restaurant.
- Train yourself and your children to GIVE rather than wait to RECEIVE. Will you, for instance, say No to a special meal or to a new dress and give that money to a poor family to buy the food or clothes or medicine they need?
Year-End:
- Think: The best help for personal growth is awareness. Do not simply live blindly or automatically. See the significant persons and events of 2019. What have been the best lessons? What do you need to do differently?
- Thank: Do not take the good for granted: Health of body and mind, healthy family members (e.g., normal, healthy children), ability to learn and work, people who have been nice to you, financial security, a house to live in, food on the table, safe surroundings, medical care. Thank God! Thank those who help you.
- Pray: Prayer is not our reminding God to help us. God needs no such reminders. In prayer, God reminds me of the essentials I forget. He invites me to come closer to Him.
- Bless: Never curse anyone in thought or word. Bless people in your heart and in your words. (Blessings and curses come back to us!)
- Forgive: As the Buddha says, “Anger is like keeping a burning coal in your hand, and expecting others to get hurt.” Let go!
- Apologize: When you say “Sorry” sincerely, it sets off a chain reaction of good feelings.
- Clear: Clear the mess—on your desk, in your house, in your life. We all tend to accumulate useless junk—whether physically or emotionally. A clean desk, a clean house, and, above all, a clean heart will lead to peace of heart and increased energy.
- Plan: Plan the new year. Divide the tasks into: (a) Essential; (b) Important; (c ) useful; (d) unimportant; (e ) harmful. Make sure to find time for the first three.
- Share: Have someone you trust deeply with whom you can share your plans, dreams, hopes, failures, fears. Such sharing can help us avoid pitfalls, discover our gifts better, correct our weaknesses in time, and function at our best.
- Celebrate: Celebrate life! You do not need a hotel room, or fancy clothes, or gourmet food or alcohol to celebrate. Just being with family and friends (or religious community) and enjoying the very togetherness brings deeper joy than costly parties. (Many partying types are lonely and lead empty lives.) You can, with your family, have an hour of prayer (in church or at home) from 11 pm to midnight, thanking God and each other. Then, attend the midnight Mass to start the new year with God. (“With God” means: God is always with me; but I may or may not be keen on His company. When I consciously make space for God in my life, the quality of my life changes.)
Will you try these ten tips to end the year happily, and to start 2020 even happier?
Fr Joe Mannath SDB
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