My good friend Kevin Sullivan—who, with his wonderful wife Crystal contribute our Couplespeak column every month—worked at a legal firm. He retired early to do full time ministry, together with Crystal. They have helped so many people, especially young couples. They also do retreats for prisoners and others.
Kevin is disturbed and shocked at the damage pornography is doing—to couples, to youngsters, to families, to the future of men and women, to the church. He sent me an article about this problem, with shocking statistics.
That is how this issue was born. I had another topic in mind for this issue. But Kevin’s wisdom and passion for helping people prevailed.
Then I found that this is not simply an American or Western problem. I didn’t know India is a huge consumer of porn. In fact, two of our well-known secular magazines (Outlook and The Week) devoted recent cover issues to this topic. Did you know that during the 2020 lockdown porn consumption in India almost doubled?
The problem is serous and widespread. People of all ages and backgrounds seem to be drawn to it. The majority of addicts are young, since they are more at home with computers and smart phones. Gender-wise, the division among addicts seems to be 70% men and 30% women.
I am grateful to some genuine friends who helped me put together this special issue—Kevin himself, who got the ball rolling; Fr Aneesh Chacko SDB, who wrote an unusually clear and helpful article on this addiction, and also listed and reviewed uptodate books on this addiction; Fr Jose Parappully SDB, who wrote about its impact and remedies, and a very honest woman religious who volunteered to write about how she got trapped in it, leading to severe depression and thoughts of suicide, and what helped her to become free. I added a small piece on the Indian situation and Indian laws about pornography.
Further, for those who like to watch helpful videos on the topic, here are two I would recommend. They are both found on YouTube. Put the title given here in YouTube and click:
“The Horrifying Truth about the Porn Industry” by Father Daniel P Horan OFM (837,726 views,
30 May 2020); “For Any Woman Struggling with Pornography and Masturbation” by Mari Pablo (14,700 views, 8 Sept 2021). Both are engaging speakers.
* * *
The problem is huge—and largely hidden. Many more people are addicted than we may think. They need help—before they destroy themselves or their marriages and families.
Read. Learn more.
If you are addicted, get help before it is too late.
If you are a spouse, parent, teacher, formator, superior, know it affects many in your care—including children.
You are incredibly blessed if you have loving relationships—family, friends, religious community, colleagues—people you care about and whose love you are sure of. There is nothing to match genuine love and goodness. Love and meaningful work protect us from many addictions—including porn.
Those who are not so blessed, are in greater danger—of this and other addictions. No wonder people who are isolated or lonely or emotionally stressed, with no one to confide in, become addicted more easily. This can happen among youngsters, or in marriages, families, religious communities or single life in general.
Be more aware. Learn and teach to use social media for doing good. Know that probably more people within your own circle (family, friends, religious community or ….) are addicted and need help, but they may be afraid or hesitant to seek the help they need.
Read the articles and see. For more information, thirteen books dealing with this issue are presented, too.
May you be free of addictions. May you be a loving liberated person who will help to set many others free.
* * *
This is a double issue, but without extra pages. The Post Office did not allow us to add pages, or to post an extra issue in the middle of the month, as we had planned to do.
To subscribe to the magazine, click Subscribe
